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Wednesday, December 7, 2011

How Sexy is Your Sex?


There seems to be some misperception and misunderstandings about sex. I’m not talking about how men think they should get a try before they buy and women don’t want to give it up before marriage. I’m talking about girls who put out before the “I do’s” then they don’t.

I’ve been married for over twenty years to the same man. Yes, the same man and I have been having sex for two decades without bringing anyone else in or seeking loving outside just the two of us. So I can’t say that if I found myself suddenly single I wouldn’t sleep with a guy before we started getting serious. I’ve grown accustomed to having sex a couple of times a week and I’m not sure I could go without. Anyways, my point being that if you’re going to have sex a certain way before the marriage then after the marriage you should perform the same way.

That doesn’t mean that if the sex before marriage is boring you have to stay boring after marriage. After marriage you can get freaky with your partner. Go wild, buy toys or tie each other up. See how long you can play with the other person before they reach orgasm. Stretch it out on those nights that you have time so you and your honey are totally exhausted. One thing you should never do is tone it down after marriage. If you had supper sexy sex before you walked down the aisle then after you walk the sex should be even sexier.

Acting one way before the “I do” and another way after the “I do” is false advertising. This goes for both men and women. If the men are super nice and loving before the wedding then turn into jerks that’s not right. They have no right to demand anything from their wife. Likewise, if the woman plays fun sex games before the marriage and after the marriage won’t let the crown of her husband’s penis pass her lips then shame on her.

Catching a husband or a wife isn’t a game, it’s real life. Your future spouse deserves to know the truth about what you will and won’t do and how you will and won’t act. Fixing the problem is going to take more than one blog post, it’s going to take people actually caring about other people in their lives.
One of the basic misperceptions is that sex with another person is about you getting off. It’s not. You can get off by yourself. There is nothing wrong with masturbation. It’s easier for everyone and can be done anytime just not anywhere though. Masturbation is easier on your checkbook, no dates required. It’s easier on your health, no chance of getting a STD and easier on your emotional state, especially if you accidently hook up with a psycho.

Sex with another person is about showing the other person how much you care. Sadly most people miss that point and it’s the most important point dealing with sex. Having intercourse with another is about you making sure they feel cared for. They may or may not reach orgasm but did you care for them. For me to have sex with someone I would have to care for them first. Too many people don’t get what sex is about. They mistakenly think it’s all about them but life is rarely about you and in relationships it is never about you.