Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Will we ever learn-- The harsh realities of the MM genre

In the years that I’ve been writing I’ve seen a lot of crap. Last year at GRL a new to MM author, though not new to writing as she has multiple MF bestsellers under her belt, approached me and said, “Well it’s obvious I’m not part of the ‘in’ crowd.” She went on to tell me that she’d never felt so ostracized and left out of an author group as in a group of MM authors.

Two years ago the MM community decided to spread lies about Kindle Alexander and to this day people still believe those lies. Every time Kindle Alexander has a new release, her FB page gets reported. People treat her like crap and talk shit about her.

For a group that talks about equality, fighting for gay rights to marry, or not marry, or just exist without persecution, we sure don’t apply those same feelings or fight to make sure other people aren’t crucified. Kindle was judged harshly based on a lie that just won’t die. Readers like Kindle Alexander’s books, get over it.

Now, on to what this post is really about. A reader was recently thrown under the bus, and accusations of her being evil were tossed around FB like candy at a parade. Her biggest sin, she is a Christian. She has not reported anyone. She has never been hateful, but her family doesn’t know she’s bisexual. So as a community, the MM group decided to flay her. Congratulations, we’ve lost a reader.

Many new readers to the genre might be in situations where they CAN’T have their family find out that they read MM romance because then it would expose the truth that they are gay or bi. Yes, it’s a big beautiful world out there for gay people who are out and who have support, but not a week goes by that I don’t see a story of some guy or girl getting beat up because they are gay, bi, or trans, and that’s in the USA where we have some protections for gays.

Be kind. If you don’t like someone on FB, block them. Unless you have proof, please don’t treat others like this poor reader was treated. She’s done nothing wrong, other than try to hide the fact from her family that she is bi.


Ann Alaskan said...

Thank you Sara for this post. Have noticed that the mm genre community has been picking up the harshness of the rest of the world. Let's hope it stops! We're suppose to be about support and LOVE for one another!

Inner Goddess said...

Amen. Both stories are so true. When I started my blog, I made the commitment to the motto : Love is Love. If the story is about Love, I post about it. I don't judge on characters or steam level. But I have had several friends that later became authors and won't come to my blog much less use my blog/services to promote their new releases. My mother, who only reads Christian Historical Romance, has been to my blog more than these Romance authors. I love Kindle and am always happy to have her on the blog. You too, Sara. Thanks for speaking up.

Michelle Roth said...

No matter what your thoughts, feelings, or ideologies are and how they differ from someone else's, there's no reason to be unkind. There are so many more important uses of my time.

Well said, Sara. <3

Kazy Reed said...

Thanks for writing this. I hadn't heard any of it, and I'm glad I didn't. First, I too loves Kindle's writing. Second, I too consider myself Christian, but was raised to love all and judge none. My mother knows I write mm, and while she's not thrilled with it, she said that she loves me no matter what, and it breaks her heart when she hears of LGBT kids being kicked out of their homes for being who they are. I haven't had any negative comments because I'm Christian, but being straight, I know I have it much easier. I can't imagine how hard it is for any person to hide what they are from their family. I guess I was lucky with mine.

DragonLady said...

No one... let me repeat that... no one has the right to decide for another what is and what isn't legitimate and authentic in his or her life.

I sometimes wonder if some M/M authors are in the genre simply because it's "hot" and marketable, and not because it reflects a deeply embedded belief in gender equality.

As the mother of a trans, I am incredibly proud of my new daughter and I am all too aware of the harsh realities facing anyone who dares wander off our rigid binary system.

April Watts said...

People are people and they have to be ignorant to someone, and it is easier to be nasty to someone who you do have to see. There is always hope that they will change though. So just smile and remember you are the better person! <3